“Perfectionism is not the same thing as striving to be your best. Perfectionism is the belief that if we live perfect, look perfect, and act perfect, we can minimize or avoid the pain of blame, judgment, and shame. It’s a shield. It’s a twenty ton shield that we lug around thinking it will protect us when in fact, it’s the shield that’s really preventing us from flight.”
~Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection
Brené Brown nailed it, don’t you think? Yet as much as we know that perfectionism is holding us back, it’s still challenging to ignore it.
How about you? Is perfectionism holding you back from writing your book or doing media interviews to share your expertise? Because it’s a common theme among the authors and experts I coach. Especially the women. (Almost exclusively the women.)
Maybe even you.
If perfectionism is keeping you silent, I have a message for you.
Perfectionism is the enemy of connection.
The most powerful thing that can happen in a media interview is that you make a connection with the people in the audience. Because if viewers feel connected with you, they will want more. That means they will follow you on social media, go see you speak, and buy your book. In other words, those viewers will begin to see you as a trusted source.
That can’t happen if you look, act, and speak perfectly. Why not? Because perfection builds up a wall. It comes between you and the people at home you are trying to reach.
So please don’t squander an opportunity to connect with the people who need your message by carrying the heavy burden of perfectionism. Trust me, I have done this in front of an audience. My worst ever speech as a parenting expert was awful precisely because I was trying too hard to be someone else. I still cringe when I think about it. But you know what? When I recall mistakes I made (on live television) while just being myself, I give myself grace and move forward. Because at least that was me.
So learn from my mistake. And visualize what Brené Brown means when she talks about carrying around a twenty-ton shield in the hopes it will offer protection from judgment. It does prevent you from being hurt, right? But it also prevents you from being heard. And you have something to say. So, put down your shield. It was only ever holding you back.
P.S. Speaking of holding you back, being unprepared to speak to someone in Media about yourself, your book, and your message can cost you game changing national publicity. Unless, you get ready first by getting my free PDF Media Success Quick Start Guide: Ready for Publicity in 30 Minutes.
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